ThoughtCafe | Creative Thinking At Its Most Cynical

Making evil plans for world domination? Everyone’s gotta start somewhere…

Every fortress has its vulnerabilities. No matter how high the walls or deep the foundations there is always a way in. Just like an operating system.

Google has been freely distributing the Android OS in order to help the company harvest your personal information which it then sells for a profit make the world a better place. At the other end of the nerd spectrum, Microsoft has been charging customers through the nose to experience the joys of the blue screen of death. But, regardless of how much you do, or don’t pay, they’re both designed to encourage developers to build applications for them. Even the kind of app that can be used to kill you in any number of unusual ways – like these… Continue reading →

“Sorry kids, it’s time to smash all those false happy endings on the rocks of despair.”

Ever wondered where storylines for children’s films come from? If you’re an old romantic like me then you probably assumed that each and every movie is the result of a passion to thrill and entertain. Wrong.

Over the years, there have been plenty of movies made that owe their very existence to some truly scary events. Movies like these… Continue reading →

“Call me cute once more and I’ll kick your arse into next week.”

The animal kingdom is full of cute, furry little creatures that make us to go all weak at the knees. How many times have you chuckled at the antics of seemingly intelligent dogs on websites like Youtube? But secretly, all animals are evil. Their sole intent is to turn the tables on humanity and reap a bloody harvest of revenge and crushed testicles.

If you’re a non-believer then it’s time to open the book of animal revelations. Feast your eyes on once adorable creatures that have been unmasked as disciples of pain and revenge… Continue reading →

Fracking – the art of extracting trapped gas.

Hydraulic fracturing is not some kind of gruesome torture inflicted on hapless victims by loan sharks with a water filled, plastic hammer. Neither does fracking appear high on an environmental lobbyist’s list of ‘cool things to do today’. Instead, it’s a fairly new method of extracting gas by using water to shatter subterranean rock in which the fuel is trapped.

But this new industry has a problem – in the eyes of eco warriors and environmentalists, it’s the new anti-Christ. Did I say ‘anti-Christ’? I meant, ‘modern technology that must be reviled and destroyed at whatever cost just in case it proves to be useful and makes me and my other tree hugging pals look really stupid’. That’s why the energy giants need a makeover. And who better to give the hydraulic fracturing industry a fairytale slant than Disney and their loveable creations such as… Continue reading →

About this much worse!

There’s an old wive’s tale that goes like this: The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Wrong! The way to a man’s heart is through his chest – with an ice pick. But we’re not going to dwell on minor family disputes.

Apparently, the world is in the grip of a global obesity epidemic. Scientists are regularly finding new reasons why we pile on the pounds. The one constant that most studies produce is that, thanks to evolution’s perverse sense of humour, we are hard wired to gorge ourselves into an ever expanding need for loose fit clothes. This means the health food industry is having a field day. But there are a few little secrets they haven’t been telling us… Continue reading →